Everything Laudable

I have an Elijah complex. It could be a Moses complex or David or Jeremiah. I was reading a portion of Bible Study Fellowship notes this week that reminded me of that.

I have never understood it. I was discussing it with my husband the other day. Why did these people with the gift of prophesy find themselves in despair shortly after every huge movement of God in their lives? How did Oswald Chambers deal with this after every sermon as he said he did?

This complex led me to start a journal where I record every prayer answered and every movement of God I see.

Today I was given a revelation. We are allowed to witness the glory of God by hearing, by sight, by fellowship and it is what we crave. That means to me that the moment we are not in that is not just a moment of calm. The moments of not hearing or less than the fullness we know are not just a lull in the conversation. They are tragic to us. They are filled with despair. He is all we want. We yearn for Him. We desperately reach out for more... and we know yearning because we know that emptiness is anytime we do not have all of Him we can handle. We realize our forms are but dust and do not want to know ourselves, even for a moment, wthout Him.

He is everything laudable. I want more.


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